Wednesday, 28 February 2007

Visiting Dragon

Today's Dragon is "Uweollo" she is water Dragon and comes from the Red Sea, which runs from the Gulf of Suez to the Sudanese border. Its mineral-rich red mountain ranges inspired the mariners of antiquity to name the sea Mare Rostrum, or the Red Sea.

Hermits seeking seclusion founded early Christian monasteries here, sharing the wilderness with camel-trading Bedouin tribes. Today, the crags and limestone wadis of the Eastern Desert remain relatively unexplored, home to ibex and gazelle. But the Red Sea itself, dotted with coral reefs, fringed by ancient ports, teeming with underwater life, has a rich maritime history which stretches back to Pharaonic times.

Uweollo is a Higher Dragon and her job is to protect the coral reefs in the area...her message today is "Look to the stars see that which is shining brightest as this is your star"

Quiet

I feel the need to be quiet...reflective.....still....Think it's all the reading I've been doing about "counting your Blessings".........and feeling gratitude................even my Dragons have been still...quiet.....they are still there just looking...watching.....waiting.....I really believe that this energy that has entered our solar system is the cause of my self reflection..as this is not something that i do not do easily..............

I need to:-

Listen more, talk less

Understand people's differences

Know that things are not always as they seem

Go with the flow more often

Not label things / people

Know that other's options matter as much if not more than mine

Love is a 2 way street

Comprise is not a dirty word!!!

Life is there to be enjoyed not endured

Children are a blessing not a bad thing

Wisdom comes in many forms....I just need to recognise it

To breathe deeply and often (quite an important one really!!!)

The past is there to learn from not to hold on to

Mistakes are only a way to learn

Water is very good for you!!!

so is coffee!!!!!

Love to you all...any many, many thanks to you all for your fantastic support over the last few weeks..may I be able to re-pay you someday xxxx

Saturday, 24 February 2007

Visiting Dragon

Today's visiting Dragon is "Bertho" he is an Air Dragon and comes from Ellsworth in the Chilean Claim of The Antarictic Region....never knew that the Antarctic was divied up between so many different countries!!!

Bertho lives on Mount Ellsworth which is the highest peak in the Queen Maud Mountains, on the elongated massif between the Steagall and Amundsen Glaciers.

Discovered by Rear Admiral Byrd on the South Pole flight of November 28-29, 1929, and named by him for Lincoln Ellsworth, American Antarctic explorer.

Bet you never knew that either, I know i didn't!!!!

His message is "Let the LOVE flow and all else will Follow"

Funny how life works!

"I am a Genius and I apply my Wisdom" this comment I got from a book lent to me by my sleep & settle angel.......she had just got it back from another friend of mine and did not want to go back into her house as she had already locked it and was on her way to see me...and well we got talking about gratitude journals etc and then she mentioned this book...well funny how the universe works hmmm was meant to have this book...as it goes with all the workings of "the secret" and it's really an amazing book...it called "count your blessings"..........and it talks about unconditional love...and this got me thinking..we attach so many conditions to our love that it's stifled...and can not grow to it's full potential........very deep hmmmm.

I have put lots of little affirmations up around the house to say and remind me everyday of how luckly i am......

Anyway I'm a happy little Vegemite due to the fact that i now know that i don't have Post natal depression and best of all do not need anti-depressants...woo hooo....all i have to do is take the pill again and Bob's your uncle and Fanny's your aunt!!!!! i'm all good.......

Monday, 19 February 2007

Dragon Workshop

I haven't forgotten about this and will be completing this over the next 2 weeks hoping to hold it in April..so will be looking for interested people soon...i am going to be advertising it outside the cottage so you will have to let me know if you are interested as the number will be limited...about 10 in total...i will run another one if this one is popular.

change.....

a change is as good as a rest...so some say...so what out as i'm going to be changing the colours and style of my blog rather alot....

OK

Today has been an OK one....with me feeling also most back to the old me...now that could have something to do with the fact that i got my period...yes i know it's not a great thing to blog about but I'm thinking that this depression of mine is actual a bad case of PMT...as I'm no-longer on the pill and was on the pill since i was 16, and it's too early for the medication to have kicked in maybe anti-depressants aren't the go.....

Now I'm not just looking for an excuse not to take the bloodly things as I'm still taking them...but after talking to a lady from the ACE service at the John (they deal with women who have PND) she said that it did indeed seem likely that it could be just a bad case of PMT.....so i am going to keep a mood diary for the next month and I'm off to my DR again on Sat and will ask him what he thinks.....would love to take herbal stuff to correct my hormones and start taking the pill again rather these little pills.....will see what happens....

Spoke to my darling Mum & Dad yesterday after emailing them re my PND...and all i got from them was..."oh i wouldn't be taking them....you should be able to get over...your sister didn't need them"...why did i ever think that they would say or be anything different!!!! whatever......

I then called my elder sister and she was much nicer about it all...i love talking to her as she is very down to earth and tells it like it is...but always listens to your side of things then gives great advise...plus she sometimes reads my blog...so have to blog nice things about her...only kidding would have blogged it anyway....

Hi Sis if you read this...here's some Hugh hugs to you....:-)

Archie is now officially an unwrapped baby!!! whoohoooo...at 2:30 this morning he was fighting his wrap once again and this time no matter how i re-wrapped him he wouldn't settle...so i thought that now was a good time as any to try the sleeping bag as he wasn't settling anyway...and after a little time patting his back he slept until 6.30 this morning!!!! then his next two naps today he was OK with....and tonight I've only had to go in a couple of times as he will keep rolling over onto his tummy then not being able to roll back...the joys of motherhood!!!!!

Sunday, 18 February 2007

Happy Familes

BB Naming Day




We all tried a ribbon onto BB maple tree to send him a wish!!!

Well the prise of having time to myself today was my beautiful Baby Bear missing out on his sleep and getting that upset in the car that he vomited up his milk...bad mother me...i got hubby to take BB to wyong hospital as Hubby's grandma is very sick...and i didn't go coz it was more important for me to vacuum and mow the lawn...yeah right......

This medication had better work coz the way things are going are not good......i have cried more in the last 6 months since BB was born than in the whole of my 38 years......

What am i afraid of asked Mary A...well that I'm not sure of...do i have to be afraid...can the anger just be that...why does it have to cover up a fear.....yes I'm afraid that my Dad will not make it....but surely that is not the whole reason for my complete melt down...I'm a mess....I'm not me and i hate it

Saturday, 17 February 2007

Madness

When will these tablets kick in i wonder......

When will i stop feeling like a zombie in the mornings.....

When will i see any benefit from taking them.....

When will the anger go away.....

When can i stop taking them.......

Why did i start in them first place......

Why can't i just get over it.........

Why don't i have any Patience.........

What the hell is the matter with me............

What on earth has anti-natal depression got to do with me......

What will become of me.....


and we come back to WHAT the hell am i taking mediaction that makes me not me.....and WHY do i need to take them in the first place and then the WHEN the hell can i stop.......

Thursday, 15 February 2007

What now?

Well the Dr's confirmed it...I'm barking mad!!!! but at least he thinks that i can be cured...or get back to the old me!!! hmmm not sure if that's such a good idea!! oh well will wait and see on that score....

I'm officially on anti-depressants...well not until 2 hours before my bedtime today...which as I'm off to drumming circle tonight could be anytime!!! they say you need to take them the same time each night so maybe will have to take them to drumming as i don't think that i will be able to wait up that late every night!!! the joys of medication!!!

only 1/2 tablet a day..but I'm still scared as to the effects they will have on me......but will take each day as it comes..if it helps take away my anger then i will be happy indeed.

I have to say that i was a very big step for me to take, to have admit that i needed this kind of help has been hard, as I'm the type that will said...just get over it...but i tried that and surprisingly it didn't work....oh dear I've just remembered that I've forgot to take all my vitamins...lot of good they will do me in their little bottles!!!!

Maybe I'll change my blog to read "Nuttersville, Welcome 1 and all"

maybe not!!!

Today i have spent $90 on Baby Bear as i could not resist the very cute clothes on sale in Big W and Target!!! he will look soo cute...will post some pictures when he gets to wear them.

J (aka Nutter) x

Wednesday, 14 February 2007

It's a official


Well having been diagnosed with Post Natal depression when Baby Bear was 3 weeks it's now official....

....that I'm mad as a hatter!!!!! not that that would surprise many of you...

It would seem that instead of getting better my PND is only getting worse.....so after talking to my darling Bee...I've dosed myself up with Omega3, Vit B6 and Calcium / magnesium combo, all of which are say to help depression.....plus I'm off to the Dr's today so who knows i could well be off with the fairy's tomorrow...scary....i have never taken any recreational drugs so I'm very apprehensive as to what they will do to my mind / feelings......one can only try i suppose.....

Only really good thing in my life is that I've lost 7.7 kg...how sad is that!

Sunday, 11 February 2007

One Dainty, one Large, one cute




All gone

see dear Mary Ankle...all gone...count nolonger here.....oh well...will have to come up with something else....now how many's days till SPF....again!!!!!! LOL :-p

Things to be thankful for....

I'm thankful for my beautiful Saint Bee...who was there when i was having a bad moment yesterday....

I'm thankful for her advise and comments which held no judgement of me.....

I'm thankful for my Hubby.....

I'm thankful for my Beautiful Baby Bear.....and his laughter and smiles....there're soooo cute!!! :-)

I'm thankful for my health.....

I'm thankful for this blog...where would i be without it!!! hmmmmmm

I'm thankful for time to think of what to do in the future and not having to rush out to work again...

I'm thankful for all the support that i have received over the last few months from all you lovely Mary's...ta muchly

I'm thankful for my lovely fur children...they still make me smile.....

I'm thankful for Rose cottage...where i met most of you lovely Marys

I'm thankful for past life experince...great to get rid of stuff.....

I'm thankful for a quite house at the moment as Baby Bear is asleep...with no fuss!!!!!

I'm thankful for this new computer...it's sooo much fastest...betterer...than my old one!!!

I'm thankful for my will power...i will not have that chocolate, that cake, that sticky bun.....i will be good!!!

I'm thankful for My Hubby...oh that's right alreay said that...but am much thankful anyway...

I'm thankful for my Dragons who are contuning to give me heaps of stuff for my workshops...

I'm thankful for, I'm thankful for, I'm thankful for.....just being alive...

phew...am very exhausded being thankful.....need to go have a cuppa...

Jx

Friday, 9 February 2007

Past Life Experiance

Yesterday I went and had Craniosacral Therapy done...well it was amazing to say the least....i had a past life experience....I was a leader (of course!!) of a warband and the first image that i got through was me hold onto someones hair...but the someone was dead and i had killed them...i turned and held up the head to my warband in a gesture or triumph as i had just killer the leader of the other warband so was now the victor!!! when i was asked how i felt in this scene there was no remorse or regrets, just a feeling that the world was as it should be!!!! not a very nice person was i then i don't think...then the scene shifted to me looking out over the camp with all the fire pits and spit roasts...and i was walking along the edge of the woods and one part of me knew that i shouldn't be walking there but my ego said that nothing could happen to me!!! I was asked why i felt that i shouldn't be walking near the woods and i said because there was something in the woods that was not good for me...there were archers in the woods from the other warband who had come around the back of my warband......then i look back at the castle that was now mine with my back to the woods and yes....got shot in the back with an arrow.....i didn't feel the arrow going in as i was more of an observer but then i fell forward and tried to crawl back to the back camp...but at the same time i knew that i was not going to make it!!! then i was floating above the camp and this was when i got my first feelings of regrets as i wished that i could have warned my warband.....then i watch as they were killed and their souls started to float up into the air..then my druid came to came me onto the next phase of my journey saying that i could not watch this...i didn't want to leave as i was fascinated with this..as some of the souls look muddy and patched....my druid got quite angry with me and pushed me into the light...then i was in a large waiting room with a big desk and lots of chairs...i was the only one there and sat down to wait then the screan faded away.......

So now i have worked through that one life time as i was still carrying the trauma from the arrow in this life time...i can now breath some much freer....

Interesting stuff eh!!!!
Jx

Wednesday, 7 February 2007

Visiting Dragon

Today's Visting Dragon is "Nordra", he was one of my first Guardian Dragons....he is a Fire Dragon and he is bronze in colour with black wings and tail. Norda comes from Bergen in Norway. He looks after the Norwegian Royal Family.

His message for today is "Never loose sight of your goals"

Sunday, 4 February 2007

Baby Bear



Thought i'd put some pictures of Baby Bear on the web, now is a good time to do so

Visiting Dragon

Today's Dragon is "Jitoth", he is a Fire Dragon and comes from Namibia, Africa...he lives on Mt Schroffentstein. Jitoth is there to help raise the female life expectancy which stands at 37 years at the moment!!!! He also looks after all the mining that goes on in Namibia mainly of diamonds, gold and silver...all which Dragons love!

Jitoth message is "Look at your life as a starting point of which you can go anywhere, be anything and do anything"

Saturday, 3 February 2007

Ants

I was taking a moment to just be the other day, i was having a quite cup of tea out on the deck with my beautiful fur children whilst Baby Bear was alseep and i happened to notice all these ants...they were going from our plants on the pactio then under our deck, they were in a long line come and going....and each time one ant would meet up with another ant they would stop for a split second transfer information then move on......it seemed that they were all of the one mind...then i noticed this one small ant that was not in this line of ants...he was wandering all over the place.....it seemed that he was just going where-ever he wished.....i got to thinking that even in the most regimened of society there will always be those that go their own way.....

Bit like us really.......we all follow sometimes yet we are all individuals........

Jx

Thursday, 1 February 2007

Sad

Well my Dad does need to go for more chemo, which will go for about 4 months, so hopefully this will then give him more time......oh it's now very hard to be here and not there with him..last time it was different because i didn't see how ill he was before hand...now i know.....whoever said "ignorance is Bliss" is so right....but can't put my head in the sand...must be positive.....think positive....stay positive......so very hard to do easy to say!!!

Also i have just been told that a friend of mine in England has died....she was 90 years old but still a great lady....she used to live next door to us in Melksham and let me put my little red Triumph Spitfire in her garage in the winter time, so that i didn't have to spend hours trying to start in the mornings....she had a fall then later died in hospital...she had lung cancer......why is it that all those around me seem to be getting or have had or have died of Cancer...what does Cancer mean...like really mean as far as your body or soul is concrened? I don't know i think I'm rambling now.....I so wanted her to be able to meet Baby Bear........maybe in the spirit world she can see him.

Thanks for listening / reading

Jx